There are a lot of articles out there about orgasms;
- about how to have one….or two ….or three
- about how most (but not all) women need clitoral stimulation to orgasm and cannot orgasm from penetration alone
- about how sex doesn’t need to look like a porn movie (they are made to look good not necessarily feel good!)
- and that the aim of sex is to have pleasure and not to achieve simultaneous orgasms 2-3times a week!
Slightly less talked about is how men can have orgasms with or without erections and both with and without ejaculation. Men can also ejaculate without particularly feeling an orgasm.
Even less talked about are the orgasms that come from stimulation of the anus in both men and women.
Somewhere quietly in the corner, there are men and women talking about how to have sex with ageing bodies…..
Away from the orgasm chats there’s lots of great conversation about what consent really means, how to have honest communication with your partner and remembering to have fun. And we like all of this. It’s wonderful that we live in a time where the internet can bring more education around the pleasure our amazing bodies can feel than ever before.
But there is a story here that is missing, and its not about the orgasm ‘that one moment in time’ and its not about the relationship with your partner. Instead its about the orgasmic nature of this life we are living.
Something profound happens to us when really take time to awaken our bodies to sensuality and sexuality, our bodies open to pleasure in a deeper fuller way. We start to notice this thing called energy, or chi or prana.
We become aware of the ways in which we limit our pleasure (for example; tension in our bodies, shallow breathing, distracted thoughts and the emotions of anxiety, fear, shame and guilt). As we learn to remove these blocks our energy expands and we notice the orgasmic nature of life.
It’s a place that is more unending, where our breath creates ripples that fill us and expand us, rather than trying to build a head of steam in our genitals that leaves us spent and exhausted.
It’s in this place we discover our connection to everything, we discover the absolute bliss of our existence.
For most of us, we cannot use a book or even youtube video to learn how to there. We need time and we need guides. It’s a process that happens to us over a period of months and often years. And this is why we run our programmes as a series of residential workshops that take place over 18 months to 2 years. This is why people come back to repeat our workshops again and again. We need guidance, time and compassion to fully open to the orgasmic nature of existence.